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When Life Happens

We have all experienced it. Some type of loss, goodbye, or upheaval. Whether we anticipate these changes or not, change can be difficult. Having foresight into the transition may help in some ways. Knowing that once you begin college, graduation day will eventually approach. When you get married, you may no longer live alone or with family. Sometimes we see the change coming, so we feel better able to prepare ourselves. We can get our bags packed, say our farewells, and give ourselves an opportunity to sit with it all. The emotions, the fears, the excitement, the sadness, even the grief. Sometimes we do not get an opportunity to see the change coming. Sometimes it just happens. The foundation that once felt stable is now an earthquake under your feet. There is no time to pack your bags, hug your loved ones goodbye, or find a smooth surface to sit on and process your feelings. In those moments, you may feel shocked or helpless. You may feel it all, or you may feel nothing. It can feel uncomfortable and shake you up inside. That is okay. How are we expected to know how to respond when our world feels like an earthquake? Transitions alone can be difficult. Rightfully so. We get comfortable and familiar. We build connections, and feel safe. We don’t always think to plan for natural disasters. What can be learned from abrupt transitions is that when we find ourselves feeling like we are buried underneath the rubble of what we once knew or thought we had, we can wipe off the dust, clean ourselves up, and rebuild. It may take time, there may be wounds still healing, pieces around us that feel broken, but we survived this much. So we owe it to ourselves to keep going.

How do we keep going?

- We give ourselves the space and time to process the unplanned circumstances that have come our way

- We stay attuned with ourselves and pay close attention to our thoughts and feelings during this period of transition

- We let those we trust into our lives

-We reflect on what our personal definition of support looks like and try to communicate that to our loved ones

-We validate ourselves in all of our experiences. We celebrate our humanness and humility. We honor our victories, our struggles, and the fact that we are still here.

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